Fishing

We all have our preferred pastimes but, unless you're a trawlerman, isn't fishing just weird?

Man dangles rod with maggot on the end of a line in water for several days, pitting his wits against... a fish. Eventually after man has been in the freezing cold and icy rain to the point of near hypothermia, fish with the IQ of a... well, a fish I s'pose, grabs the maggot bait (which by now is probably stiffer than a Scotsman's caber) and is undone. 

Man then hoists fish out of water and gets a selfie with fish to demonstrate his superior prowess at duping fish. Then man chucks fish back into water... and does same thing again, namely dangles line in water. Fish lands back in water with cut lip thinking, "Shit, that was spicy. I ain't eatin' one of dem fings again." 

Five minutes later fish forgets his weird experience (he has the memory of a fish, after all) and goes after another of the dangling delicacies on the end of a line. Man, whose fingers are now as stiff as that Scotsman's caber since it is 3 a.m. in the morning and pitch black, feels the tug on his line and reels in exactly the same fish.

Thing is, he doesn't know it's the same fish because a lot of fish look similar (even the fish doesn't know he's the same fish) especially in the dark. Anyway, the two of them pose for another selfie, this time with fish doing a trout pout (even though he's a carp) and then man throws fish back in the water again. 

Of course, there may well be some extremely narcissistic fish that love to have their moment in the limelight and don't mind a few minutes deprived of oxygen for the sake of a moment's celebrity - the Rainbow Fish may well be such a creature. 

And what anglers do with their fish pix? Do they keep a collection on their ‘phones? Do they know each individual fish by sight from the photos? Also, if they do catch the same fish again is there some form of reunion?

   "Hey, buddy. How you doin'? Sorry about that. I didn't mean to yank you outta there so, uh... enthusiastically. Hey, didn't we meet about an hour ago? Yeah, yeah... I recognise you. Wanna another pic?"

Very odd hobby. I guess the only thing that would make this more interesting would be if, just occasionally, the fish threw the angler into the water... but they ain't that bright.